The last day of school was last Friday, the 17th. I am getting a lot of time with Ari. I love it. But I would lie if I said having her home was not challenging. It’s not about her. It’s not that she makes my days difficult or unpleasant. She is a very pleasant child 90% of the time. It is that there is a lot I would like to do for her, for our family, and it feels like it is hard to fit it all in.
Here are some of my thoughts lately:
I love doing things with her, but I can’t keep up with the house. The kitchen is a mess!
I haven’t done anything for my business this week.
She had a delicious bowl of oatmeal and I cooked other healthy things. Spent a ton of time in the kitchen. All the pots are clean. But now I feel like I neglected her for hours. PBS parented her, not me.
Could she please nap? Or at least be quiet for 20 minutes so I can nap, please?! Could she not put up a fight about rest time?! It’s getting old! Daddy, I know you hate sleeping, but did you really have to pass on those damn genes?! Those are not the genes I was hoping she would get!
Sigh... So, what next?
I remind myself of what I often tell other moms: spend time with your kid. Enjoy your kid. Let her know, with your actions, that you are truly present. Do enough house work so that your house feels livable. But don’t focus all your energy on having a spotless house. Why? Because there are only so many hours in one day and something’s gotta give. What will it be?
I rather live in a semi-messy house and have a relatively messy kitchen because I am spending time making memories with my child. Sometimes, I get her involved in the cooking process. We do laundry together. She loves to sort clothes, to put clothes in the dryer, and she loves to deliver folded clothes to Daddy! One of her all-time favorite chores is to deliver her clean night diapers to Daddy so that he can put them in the diaper stacker. She has been enjoying doing this since before she turned two and she is almost four!
My hope and goal is that I can do a passable job at doing the stay-at-home mom boring crap, i.e., keeping up with the house, and that, when my baby is an adult, she will remember her time at home with mom as time where we did things together, not time where I was freaking out about the messy kitchen, the dirty floors, etc., etc.
When I start freaking out next week, feel free to remind me!
Oh, if your house is spotless and you get plenty of time to connect with your child, honestly, you are my hero. Feel free to send some of your energy my way!