As with anything in life, when it comes to adoption, there is the good, the bad, and the ugly.
The good is the obvious: a new baby to love at home, a dream come true.
The bad and the ugly: the process of adopting can be difficult, lengthy and emotionally exhausting.
We are considering open adoption. There is a waiting period of six to eighteen months. During that time, moms might call us and they might or might not be a good match for us.
Let’s say we have a match. We wait for mom to give birth. During those few months, while we wait, I am sure we will be nervous as can be about the possibility that mom might change her mind at the last minute.
Baby is born. We spend a fair bit of time at the hospital. I imagine that will be awkward at first. I can imagine holding the baby and being afraid of bonding with him or her, just in case.
I am sure there are other possible thoughts or situations I am not aware of yet.
On to happier things, I learned today about the adoption tax credit. In other words, we would get part of our money back after adopting. This made my day. It means that adoption would be much more affordable for us than we thought.
Overall, I feel like we are in a good place. We are learning about what might come up, good or bad. I am and will continue to do a lot of research. I have joined an online adoption message board. I am looking forward to meeting people who have adopted. I have an agency I like thus far, but I will continue looking for agencies. I have a list of questions I ask agencies when I call for the first time. I spend time checking out their websites, both the areas for prospective adoptive families and the areas for birth moms. I ask about the agency’s statistics. I plan on asking agencies for references. Am I missing something, anything?!
If you or anyone you know has had any experiences with adoption, feel free to share. I am looking forward to learning more about adoption and whether or not it will be something our family will pursue.